My child’s life is being ruined by exposure to people who aren’t straight/white/cis/middle-class!

01 Jul

**Trigger warning for transphobia

In today’s edition of Agony Aunt & Uncle on Stuff, a mother of three boys has found out something “very disturbing” about one of the caregivers at the daycare her sons attend.

A friend of a friend knows her and knows that she used to be a he (and I did some digging online to confirm after I found out).

Now I don’t have a problem with transgenders but I think that a daycare should have to disclose something like this to the parents.


Worst of all, my eldest has been dressing up in girls’ clothes at kindy (I haven’t told my husband this) and I’m worried that somehow he has become confused by this person at daycare…


Seriously, you say you “don’t have a problem with transgenders” (as long as they never associate with your family, apparently) but your outrage (OUTRAGE!) speaks a whole lot more clearly. What has changed, now that you know that your childrens’ caregiver was not FAAB? Has the standard of care suddenly slipped? Is she teaching your children that being transgender, or gay, or even just a little bit different from what society expects you to be might actually be okay? I mean, can you IMAGINE?!

And oh, the pearl-clutching over the fact that your son is dressing up in girls’ clothes. First of all, almost all kids dress up. Most of them crossdress at least once (I mean, come on, some of those costumes are fucking AWESOME). Playing in dresses in kindergarten =/= transgender, but if your son IS trans*? A) they will not have been ~influenced by the caregiver~, and b) their life is going to be made that much fucking harder because of their having to deal with your transphobic bullshit.

The article’s one redeeming feature was the response from the Agony Uncle (who is usually pretty conservative), who basically tore her a new one. I was especially fond of this gem:

How would your pre-schooler even know the gender identity of his teacher? Is she called Brian? Does her tee-shirt say: “I used to have balls”? Is she standing up to pee?

Who’s at kindy here? Sounds like you and your husband are the ones who need to grow up.


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Posted by on July 1, 2011 in Trans* issues


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